


ballet tears

by atsunart



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Ballet, Ballet Dancer Sakusa Kiyoomi, Bruises, Cute Boyfriend Miya Atsumu, M/M, SakuAtsu, Sakusa’s feet, cried while writing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-09-28
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:02:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26704933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/atsunart/pseuds/atsunart
Summary: Ballet was everything to Sakusa. Good or bad. While he danced he was free, but the ballet shoe straps trapped him even offstage.
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi
Comments: 2
Kudos: 74





	ballet tears

**Author's Note:**

> sakuatsu got me thinking. when i had this idea i thought i would never post it, bc english it’s not my first language and i’m just not this confident. BUT HERE I AM. hope u enjoy it. see you in the end notes!!

As soon as Atsumu walked in the apartment he shared with Sakusa, he could hear the faint sobs of what have been a long-hour weep. The blond rushed worriedly towards the room, letting his coach and shoes fall in the halfway. When he was in front of the door, he opened it abruptly. The scene he saw made his heart break into millions pieces.

Kiyoomi was huddled in fetal position on the bed with his head over his knees, preventing Miya from seeing his face. He could only see his feet, which Sakusa was rubbing against each other as though he was trying to get rid of some dirt, his toes were moving fast and the brunet didn’t seem to be able to control his own muscles. Sakusa didn’t even bothered to crane neck up to face his boyfriend.

“Omi...” the smaller called him and slowly came closer. “Why are ya cryin’?” he questioned loudly enough for him to hear.

“Don’t step any closer!” the brunet ordered while tucking his legs under the blanket.

Atsumu ignored Kiyoomi’s words and sat on the edge of the bed next to the taller boy.

“Look at me.” he asked and carefully held both Sakusa’s hands and squeezed them in a quiet appeal.

“I don’t want you to see **them**.” he murmured in reply.

Miya, confused, inquired:

“See who?”

“ **My feet** ” he said and lift up the head to look at his boyfriend’s brow eyes

Then Atsumu understood. This one was of his crises, the first of which Atsumu witnessed in one year of dating. Ballet was **everything** to Sakusa. Good or bad. While he danced he _was free_ , but the ballet shoe straps trapped him even offstage. If freedom has a price and for Kiyoomi it was **hematophobia**. He couldn’t look to his own feet, the wounds, the nails and the accumulated blood underneath it. Miya realized that the **habit** he had of always wearing socks was a way to avoid dealing with **them**.

Looking inside Sakusa’s dark irises, the blond could see all the insecurities he had reflected there. They faced each other for a few long seconds. The taller’s tired eyes trying to stay in control.

A lonely tear fell from the brunet’s face.

“It’s okay.” the smaller whispered raising his hand to Sakusa’s face, he touched his cheek and wiped away the insistent tears “Let me see **them**.” he requested.

“ **No** ” he answered, pushing his legs together even more.

“You don’t need to deal with them alone Omi.” he argued “Not **anymore**.”

“Stop insisting **Miya**.” Sakusa tried to push Atsumu away with his arms, but the latter held his wrists tightly.

“ **Kiyoomi!** ” Atsumu screamed. “I love you.” he admitted and loosened the grip, kissing Sakusa’s right hand fingers “I love you.” he said again getting closer to the taller’s face and pressing his lips onto his forehead.

 _“I love you._ ” He repeated, kissing different spots. _Cheeks, eyelids, nose and neck._ _“Trust me.”_ the blond begged and put their foreheads together.

As they moved away, the Miya pushed the blanket that was covering Kiyoomi aside. When Atsumu could see all the injuries – various shades of purple and red – mixed on Sakusa’s feet, he smiled kindly and assuredly at the brunet’s desperate look.

“It’s beautiful.” he said. “ **Everything** on you is **beautiful**.” he continued and slid his fingers across the taller’s sensitive skin and felt him tremble. “Let me tell you something.”

Sakusa looked away from his own body, his heart was beating fast, he wanted to cover those bruises and never have to see them again.

“Close yer eyes and focus in my voice, okay?” Sakusa didn’t think twice and closed them. “All these marks,” the smaller started walking his fingers across a wound. “they are like the little birthmarks ya have all over yer body. They are a part of **you** are. Without them ya wouldn’t be... Well, **you**. They represent yer fight and yer fears, but also, yer _dreams_. You are amazing for handling it until today Omi. **But you’re not alone anymore**.”

The hiccups broke out.

“I can wash them, I can dress them, I can take care of them. That cross you bear is now mine too.”

Sakusa opened his eyes, but he did not stare at his feet. He stared at Miya and found the cure there. In those brown orbs, in the honest beaming smile and in the messy blond hair. He smiled and led his hand to the nape of Atsumu’s neck and pulled him closer.

“ _Love me_.” he asked, whispering against Miya’s lips.

“ _Forever_.” the answer came immediately and was followed by a tender kiss.

**(...)**

“Atsumu.” The brunet called him. “Help me bandage them.”

“ _Always_ ” he responded.

“ **I love you**.”

Miya smiled and lifted Kiyoomi’s right foot up and planted soft kiss there.

**Author's Note:**

> so? i might never publish anything again LOL. but if you want to talk with me or give me some help with writing and stuff, i’m on twitter (@omihinart).


End file.
